new year resolution

2009 is only a couple of days way.. yet some of us have already made plans for the whole year. i've also made my own plans.
my new year's resolution -

1. buy new car.. cheap saja.. takde duit :)
2. save money byk2
3. ****** ( rahsia )
4. ****** ( rahsia )
5. get a vacum cleaner for me to clean the whole house
6. get a cat??
7. be a better person

merry x mas part 2

yes, merry xmas again!

it's xmas and tv ni takde tayang cerita bes malam2 ni. pelik betul. siang tadi ada la cerita bes. dah malam ni tak ada pulak. suruh org tido, i guess. and me alone at home having cherry berry.. terrible betolla. i have a lot of dvds that i havent watched. but currently not in the mood for dvd. i was chatting with my old fren, we were talking bout food. haihhh... nak makan rotiboy plakk lama tak makan.. and dominoss.. and jco.. terok ahh!!

merry xmas!!

sad xmas this year..
1 . dahla takde cuti panjang mcm thn lepas ..
2 . gaji belom masuk..
3 . bonus intai2 pon tak ada gak nih.
4 . kambing plak as usual, holiday eve ginih keje la dia.
5 . geng gossip plak blk kampung! arghh minggu yg sangap betol tak dpt gossip nih.
6 . xmas eve nih takde plan plak tuh! sape nak go lepak jom!
7 . keje lom siap :(
8 . teringin nak makan dominos...

i'm tagged!!

Tagging Game

THREE NAMES THAT FRIEND CALL YOU
didi
rabby
r*****


THREE MOST IMPORTANT DATES IN YOUR LIFE
081081 - my birthday
230705 - baby's birthday
110579 - kambing's birthday


THREE WAYS TO BE HAPPY
shopping hehehehe
do something with kambing n frens
holiday


THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS AS OF NOW
deeper conversation - yuna
casablanca
bau - warkah


THREE PERSON YOU MISS FROM YOUR PAST
my ex bf
she used to be my good fren - antot
fila (beb!! bila ko habis cuti ni.. bosan gila la tak bergosippp)


THREE GIFTS YOU WOULD LIKE TO RECEIVE
a brand new 4 mil bungalow - sapela org kaya nak bagi ni..
new bmw 1 serie - i'm pretty simple
unlimited cash??


THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES
watching tv
movies
sleep


THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO FOR VACATION
europe
LA
bandung :)


THREE FAVORITE CARTOON/ANIME CHARACTER
im not into cartoon or anime :)


THREE MALLS YOU USUALLY GO TO
tesco
sunway pyramid
ioi


THREE FAVORITE DRINKS
murni's special mango juice
orange juice
milo ais


THREE THINGS FOUND IN YOUR BAG
handphone
keys
cards


THREE FAVORITE COLOURS
pink
purple
brown


TOP THREE FOODS YOU LOVE SO MUCH
unagi kabayaki
smoked salmon
ikan bakar


TOP THREE 'THINGS' SPECIAL TO YOU
my new tv :)
my phone ? ( dah buruk dah phone... takde org nak sponsor ker)
all my pillows


TOP THREE ATTITUDES YOU LIKE
humour
responsible
smart


TOP THREE FACES YOU LIKE
deanna yusof
tom cruise
baby


THREE THINGS YOU'LL BE DOING TOMORROW
work
work
lepak - it's xmas! jom lepak


TOP THREE WHY YOU ARE BUSY AT THIS TIME
some things
some things
some things

I'M TAGGING:
fila
bzz
nana

aidiladha 2008

hari raya again.. this time raya haji with my baby. despite of the 3 hrs stuck in the car in gua musang, due to massive traffic jam ( caused by the landslide ) we had so much fun going home for raya. but unfortunately i didnt get to do my project cos i couldnt find the video camera. argh.. solittle time left.4 weeks to go! before the final presentation. makin dekat time nak final presentation ni.. makin takut.. makin cuak.. yet.. makin happy gak.. cos makin dekat nak grad :) yay!!! tapi at the same time.. umur makin meningkat satu tahun lagi jugak!!! hujung2 thn ni, mcm2 la benda nak pk. kawen? tiba2 jer topic tuh keluar. salunyer, kawen tuh bkn topic yg bes nak pk. tak terasa nak pk pon.. at least for the next 2 yrs? 3 yrs? tp tetiba ter pk pasal kawen. sbb umur dh makin tua ke? atau.. sbb in a few wks, im gonna be free? free kebendenyer.. at least tak kene bebel dah kot. hahahahaha.. abah ckp dah grad kang bole pakai apa saja. hahahahahha!!

kawen is a sensitive topic, yet interesting. tipula kalau seminggu takde cite topik kawen ni dgn kawan2 seperjuangan. being an exstudent of one of the top girls boarding school, our mind has been set yg we're all cream of the cream.. we're all the best in our league. therefore we should get the best.. including the best partner. so some of us set a high standard for their partner to be. even me! but at the end of the day , the person i ended up with didnt even reach 60% of the standard i set. some parents dorang sendiri set the standard for their children's spouses. tp sebenarnye mana yg penting.. ikot hati atau to be rational.. is it my fault if i fall for someone yg tak reach even 50% of the standard i set. or maybe.. universal standard??

hari raya aidilfitri 2008

2008 aidilfitri didn't go well like aidilfitri i had before. raya without my baby. and kene cirit birit on the first day of raya. itula beraya tak ingat dunia. semua rumah mkn nasi minyak. sudahnya smpai hr ahad doksakit perot. aduhhhh.. act today baca online the star. found this great article by dina zaman. thot she's still with tv3.. paste sinije ek article tuh

Why do men take second wives?

A WRITER'S LIFE
By DINA ZAMAN

Polygamy has nothing to do with culture or religion. Men, and women too, cheat because they can.

WHEN a male friend told me he planned on taking a second wife, all I could do was try not to choke on dinner. Are you serious, I asked. He said yes, he had fallen in love with a single mother, but it was not his fate to marry her.

Thinking it was perhaps due her compassion, her earnest desire to bring up her sprogs in a Godly way and that life was indeed a struggle, I choked on my dessert when my friend told me the first thing he noticed about her was that she owned a great set of jugs.

Now, my friend takes his religious obligations very seriously. His first wife wears the hijab. So to hear him admit that it was his paramour’s cleavage that caught his heart was quite shocking.

It was due to women like me, whose so-called Western, secular and feminist ideas of polygamy that pushed it underground. I then asked him, whether his equally-pious wife agreed to him taking on another wife, and he said no. She gave him an earful.

But our friend was on a roll. Now that his journey into polygamy was thwarted, it was all our fault. We modern Malay women, be they religious or not, were forcing men like him to marry in Thailand or Iran, where they practised nikah Muta’ah.

He was emulating the steps of our good Prophet Mohamed, he argued.

“You have got your Islamic history upside down! Nabi married war widows, and his first wife was older than he. Aishah was the youngest. And I don’t think our Prophet married any woman because she had great breasts!”

“You don’t understand.”

“Okay then. Why don’t you sell your car and take a camel to work then?”

I’m realistic. I know men who adore their wives and love them to bits, but they can still love their mistresses and other wives. Am I condoning affairs and polygamy? No. But this happens. It has nothing to do with Islam or being Malay, though polygamy is part of the culture.

We’re Asians. We have a long history of concubinage. There are good men who are faithful, and there are good men who have other wives. There are also bad men who are faithful and also bad men who are unfaithful.

Just like our politics, love in Malaysia is a circus. Weeee!

I’m not going to bore you with what polygamy in Islam is about, as it has been written before and talked about to death. Women’s rights activists have long fought for this “crime” to be illegal, but we face a tough fight. Sometimes it’s not the men who are itching for it, but yes, our gender, too.

In the 80s, when I was young and clueless, meeting mistresses and second or third wives would be sinful and against my principles.

These days? “Oh, you’re a mistress?” “Oh, you’re a hidden wife?” Yawn. Wear tudung or mini skirt, got. Educated or stupid, got. Some of our mothers are The Other Women, and are good mothers. So how?

Is this phenomenon particular to our culture? Oh no. Read the British newspapers. Mistressing is talked about to death in feminist columns.

But I thought after that dinner with my friend, I’d revisit the issue again. Some of the findings from my five-sen survey:

> Theoretically ... polygamy is OK. But must ikut hukum Allah lah. There are conditions.

> Ya, but… actually, kan, for career women like us, it does work. Nak jaga laki 24 jam … gue tak larat la. Biar bini nombor satu jaga. After all, in Islam, polygamous wives are taken care of legally. Better a Muslim second wife than a common law wife.

> But really. Think about it. Convenient, what. You see him once a week, makan once a week, have sex once a week...

> Sex once a week?! Baik tak yah jadi bini nombor dua macam tu! Chit. Once a week mana cukup?!

Why do men cheat? Again, just an observation dwelled upon by friends and myself. For a lot of polygamous men, they marry good women who fit their criteria of holiness, wifeliness and motherhood.

Intimacy between the men and their wives are perfunctory. It’s make-the-baby-cover-the-face sex. With their girlfriends and second wives, it’s Penthouse all the way, baby. It’s the soul thing.

At least this is what I got from talking to quite a number of married men. It’s not because of the first wives’ lack of trying; they want to have healthy intimate lives, but the bees in their husbands’s bonnets keep reminding the men of the Madonna-Whore syndrome.

Malaysia is not a place for single women desiring Hollywood-movie type of marriages and love. KL especially is a city for marriages and affairs. And it has nothing to do with money. There are rich men who cheat, and I know of a despatch boy who has two wives!

There are many single-again women like my friends and I, who still believe in marriage and love. But I can tell you, should we walk down that path again one day, we’re going down it with our eyes open and keep a part of our hearts to ourselves. Because you never know.

Perhaps my friend, an activist who makes a living entering and staying in war zones, is right.

“We have women like you, me, your mother, your aunt and friend who fight so hard for women and children and yet face a brick wall, simply because we ‘understand’ so much, and forgive all the time, which is why cheating, affairs and polygamy are rampant, to the detriment or contribution (depends how you look at it) of our well-being,” says my friend.

Another friend, Sharizal Sharaani, put it succinctly: “Men (and, yes, women too) cheat because they can. Full stop.”

The writer still believes in love and marriage and wants to move to Corfu

anyway, sgt menarik article tuh. and im also against polygamy.

my birthday!

tomorrow is my birthday.