Monday, March 19, 2012

i always find ambitious and successful man sexy

alhamdulillah, ive completed my Masters degree and im totally happy with the result. and im also happy with my research.

but im still here. at the same place. same place physically and emotionally. im still with the same college. i used to think that i wanna go somewhere else after my Masters but im still here! the only thing that i think can bring me further is my research. i really2 hope ill get accepted for the conference in Jakarta. im still working on it. its my first time, so im kina confuse. not sure of what i should do. not sure if its right or wrong. maybe i think too much and put a high hope on it. that's why i cant start even a word on the abstract!!!arghhh!! this is stressful! and i have lotsa assignments to mark plus new subjects syllabus to work on. i know that's not my job. i knooowwww i knowwww!! i just cant stand and watch it not being done correctly. maybe my boss is correct when he said im not much of a person who's good in teaching. im just good in organizing things. maybe i should just take up the job i had in hand before. something i reallyyyyy love to do!!!!! but come to think of it, why do we plan our life? when at one point we choose other route instead?

im still at the same emotion state. i m just too afraid of changes maybe. but i know what i want. maybe im too frighten that i may end up alone. thinking about ***** makes me miserable. i dont want to feel miserable. i managed to stop thinking about this person for couple of months. but when i started thinking about ***** again, it got me back to my miserable state of mind. ***** made me feel inferior. and my self esteem goes down whenever i think about *****. it made me think that only achievements can bring back my self esteem so i wont feel inferior when im with *****, in other words, its good! it drives me to achieve more and more. well i always find ambitious and successful ppl sexy! however, first thing first!

Sunday, December 25, 2011

syurga cinta

i watched this movie starring Awal Shaari last month on astro. or tv3, i dont remember. its about Awal who did not practice a real muslim life. he parties almost everyday. basically Awal and his family dah too western. drink and get drunk most of the times. nway Awal met this young malay girl, a teacher kat skola adik dia. his frens bet with him that he will not be able to make the teacher to fall in love with him in a month. so he took the bet. within 1 month of the getting-to-know process, he fell in love. and after 1 month dia ajak that girl and dia and his frens gelakkan the girl for her foolishness. so the girl was very frustrated. Awal loved the girl so much but he's too coward to admit it. he went to see the girl's grandfather. and the grandfather gave him a piece of advice
kalau bercinta dan membuat dosa dan berkahwin, it is jodoh dari syaitan
dapat berkahwin dgn menggunakan sihir, it is jodoh dari jin
kalau berkawan dgn ikhlas dan berkahwin, it is jodoh dari allah. itulah namanya syurga cinta and jodoh kekal sampai bila2..

i can't stop thinking about it till now. i want the 3rd jodoh. jodoh dari Allah. which i havent found yet. i know i like someone but, i dunno how things are gonna end. but i hope he is the right jodoh for me. i know my family will like him and things feel so right.

Saturday, December 24, 2011

bengang bengang bengang

bengang bengang bengang..

i dont understand why a Master student (well 3 of them worked on it together) can't come up with a simple market research. questions berterabur masuk salah category. tak masuk lagi soalan yg salah. my diploma students can do better than them. nak betolkan blk, sakit hati tgk. mcm baik i buat sendiri je semua ye dak?? byk gila corrections ni. aduhhhhh.. pening2...

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

tuesday blues..

i woke up late today. sgt malas pada hari ini.. i wish i could stay asleep at home :(

Monday, November 28, 2011

it's been a while..

it's been a while since i last blogged. yup, blame my laziness. i do have a lappy, i do have 247 internet access or at least at the office. i was just lazy. and since jan 2010, a lot of things have happened.

1. i've been teaching for almost a year now..
at a college in PJ (note: i love PJ!!) it is not something i ever dreamed of when i was small. i always wanted to be something much bigger than what i've been doing, and do. i guess things don't always go as planned. "kita hanya merancang, Tuhan menentukan". but im glad i took the job earlier this year as I'm happy with what I'm doing now. everything seems clearer now. of course, there are times when i feel like this job is no fun, that i should ve taken up my dream job which was offered to me few months back. i know i would be enjoying every single moment if i took up the job. but i have to stick to the ground as i've set my goals and plan. so i have to stick to the plan. anyway, i love my new job! i love my new colleagues! and i love my students! ( and i love the times i get to get away from work !)

2. im going to finish my Master degree soon!!
darn! im getting lazier day by day. help me!! im so not gonna grad if i dont stop being lazy. im just blur now.. i wanna do it. 3 mths holiday has turned me into the opposite me. i miss those busy days.. when i didnt go out at all! my whole life was work , study, work, study...

3. i have cats!!!
i had 2 cats in the first place, they are nyiaunyiau and john johnny jonathan. johnny is my cat, nyianyiau is kambing's cat. 2 months later i adopted lily. few months after that, baby took adopted nyiaunyiau. and on 1st muharram, i was officially the owner of 8 cats after lily gave birth to 6 baby cats. 6 BABY CATSSS!!!! OMG i have lotsa cats nowwwww!!!!!!!!

4. bff got a boy!
yatoq delivered a healthy babyboy in june. his name is Ady Rifqy.

Monday, January 4, 2010

2010 has arrived!

obviously 2010 has arrived. it's january 4th today.
alhamdulillah, 2010's finally here with good news
1. starting new career
2. opps .. getting new brother in law ( sister getting married la .. she finally made up her mind )
3. sabah here i come!! holiday is also a good start i guesss.. eventhough tht means bln ni pokai
4. __________________ pls fill in the blank

i went to *** today, had to go few places before i get to settle my stuff. while i was trying to figure how the hell was i going to get my car out of there, cos there's only entrance to tht car park.. but no way out. bumped into this indian uncle who parked just next to me ( he just bought his toyota prius, nice.. wtj **** ) i asked him the way out of tht place, he asked me to follow him, he also admitted, that car park is confusing him too. we had little chat. then i went to the sgs. saw him there again! then he went out of there,, guess his prob is settle. unlike me, i had to wait nearly half an hour there. nearly fell asleep. when it comes to my turn.. while waiting for the lady to key in my name in the computer, that uncle appeared again, just next to me. uiks.. what a small world. and he's doing the same thing as me, registration. but he looks too old for that i guess. " eh we keep on bumping into each other la today ! " i just smiled at him..

anyway, i managed to settle my stuff today and im happy cos im going to start my hectic life tomorrow. ni pon seronok ? * sigh * then i did someshopping . beli buku baru!! excited kan?

Monday, September 28, 2009

a boring monday nite

its a not so ok raya this raya. so so.. but i had great time spending my 10 days of annual leave. lazying at home. still on holiday today. esok dah starrt keje tp malasnye nak gi keje esok. bole tak nak mc?? mmg food poisoning ni tak baik2 lagi.. evershince the 3rd day of raya. stopped at every petrol station and rnr membuang. aduhhh sakit betol perot.. siap demam2 pening kepaala mase tuh. dahla otw blk kl. teruk kan?

after tuh gi mlk dgn ren and baby. we went to the zoo. had fun there. zoo mlk has a lot of tigers, suprisingly. last time i went to national zoo they have like 2 or3 tigers only and sume dah tua2 pulak tuh.. tp kat zoo melaka ni gagah berani betol semua. baby suka betol tgk tigers and lion kejap2 dok aumm aummm hahahaha!! we stayed a nite in mlk and went back to kl on friday.

on saturday kemas2 rumah.. sunday.. erm..tido.. today.. nak gi servis kete tp tk dpt. queue ramai.. tambah lagi nak kene tuka sparepart tuh . dahtuh.. dia kata 3,4 jam gak amik masa.. tk sempat sbb smpai sana dah kol 1. so dia suh gi blk next week. hmm.. terpaksa la bgn awal2 pg next week. kambing keje hari ni. and i miss kambing today.. my teddy bear